Game of Thrones Season 6 Episode 7: Peasants Everywhere

Sup yall toe suckin, paint snortin bishes, iss ya boi Rock Digglesbee aka Smack Daddy Simulator 5000 aka the Phantom Pisser aka Donald Dank, an iss dat time of the week again.

So Jaimie brings his wingman, ya boi Bronn the Bro, along on his lil lads night out to Frey Country, where they stumble across some dunce cap wearing peasants tryin to sell rope to the Blackfish by pretendin to hang his semi-retarded nephew. Seriously, those Frey lads must've just hijacked a truck fulla those minging grey and brown hats or the caretaker from Hogwarts just gives them out every year for Christmas whilst tryin to convince his family he's just goin senile so he can get away wid givin them shits.

This is the face of a cunning mufucka.

Blackfish watches this lil pantomime for a few moments before his chronic bladder infection flares up again in the presence of peasant ass Freys and he wanders off to watch Emmerdale or sumthin. Jaime steps up an bitch slaps the more disgusting lookin peasant for his dingy colour schemes an shit, whilst Bronn gives out advice on what colours match the soldiers' eyes.

Jaime then gets verbally roasted by Blackfish, who tells him he's disappointed in him, making Jaime wonder if Blackfish is really his father. He returns to the Freys with a MISSION COMPLETE banner an a Tony Blair sex doll. Bronn is disappointed with this.

Meanwhile the FUCKIN HOUND RETURNS BOISSSZ!!!! Whilst livin wid his new homeless stoner Iraq vet priest best bud, an gettin blazed in the valleys, the Hound briefly wonders if Arya's doin alright, whilst his godly pal starts shoutin orders to his flashbacks.

Arya gets brutally stabbed like a pregnant sidebitch at a wedding party. However, it turns out the locals who ignored a blind girl gettin the shit beat out of her in broad daylight will also ignore a girl bleeding and stumblin all ova da place too. Seemed like such a pleasant place, wid that local murder cult of assassins an shit.

Sansa an Jon meet a girl, but because she ain't ginger, Jon's mystical powers of literally being Jesus Christ have no effect. Also, she's like twelve years old, so it would be a bit weird, unless they fed her some of Bran's puberty pills. Davos tries to adopt her, but she knows it would just end wid MILFassandre burnin her ass as a sacrifice to the weather forecast. She tells them to get fuckt, before providing a few roadies to help the Stark Family Final World Tour. Damn, she probably coulda kicked Joffrey's arse as a fetus a few seasons back son. Reminds me of dis bitch wat gave me my first Valentine Card...

Good times.

Dat cool ol lady tries to convince Margery dat the only way Game of Thrones can possibly get more viewers is if she does a naked walk, but dat shit ain't happenin apparently cuz the Shame Nun lost her bell. The High Sparrow also gives off intense "creepy maths teacher outside your window at night" vibes when he tells Margery he's concerned she's not lettin Tommo drown his kingly boner in her queenly cavern. He pretty much strate up tells her she needs to fondle some royal balls for the greater good. Not like priests would ever do anything sexual involving child...oh... oh no... flashbacks to choir practice!!! No... NO NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

Speakin ov priests, less check up on the Hound's new BFF...

...ah... shoulda known... he got killed... well, at least we still got the Hound!

MVP ov da episode... shit mang, Blackfish, Bronn, the lil Bear Island girl, Margery's nan, stoner hippie priest hobo, THE FUCKEN HOUND... really anyone who wasn't dressed in greyish brown peasant ass clothes.